The Bigger Fish Company
by Gallian Squad 7
Summary: Is the world at large too much to handle? Are you going up against things that no sane being would ever dare face? Are you some poor sap down on their luck and need the bad guys taken down a peg? Then look no further than the Bigger Fish Company! We guarantee customer satisfaction with our conflict resolution teams for the price of a phone call, no matter the problem! Call today!
1. Chapter 1

**For those of you who don't know, I was inspired to write by three stories. 'Potentia Amoris' by Lux Aureus, 'New Chance' by Hektols, and 'The Supernovas of Mass Effect' by Blindluck92. Those three were some of my favorites and I go back and reread them from time to time if I need the inspiration.**

 **This one is inspired by the Supernova story, but with my own twist. What happens when you have several dozen beings of power that span multiple realities get really bored? Why, they start up their own help agency to screw with multiple universes and generally hand the forces of malice a big middle finger.**

 **Why can they do that you may ask? Well, in the vast infinite span of realities, absolutely screwing over the evil forces in one reality can be balanced by having several million people just stub their toe. Also, when you have one power above you and everything else below you, who cares?**

 **Regardless, this is just supposed to be a fun time where the bad guys have very bad days. If you have a suggestion or a request for the agency to pop up in, feel free to share.**

 **For now, we'll start in my favorite book series, The Dresden Files.**

 **Let's go!**

Being the sole wizard for hire in Chicago wasn't always the best gig.

I always saw one of three clients who needed my particular brand of services, the smart, the desperate, and the smartly desperate. You'd think paying the Yellow Pages for a spot in the phone-book would get you more than that, but people didn't tend to believe in things like magic.

At least until an ogre or some other nasty is trying to use your skull as a cup, but it's a little late at that point.

Anyway, my usual cases as a wizard for hire, PI license and everything, involved lost items and exorcisms. Not the most exciting work, but I'd learned long ago that exciting also meant danger, and I was a squishy that could get his head ripped off if he wasn't looking right, no matter how well prepared I was.

Exciting also meant that a lot of people would be in danger if I screwed up and that weighs on you, even if you get Burger King afterwards, and I have a hard-enough time getting to sleep with all the other baggage I dragged around.

So, when you have to go to a meeting with the Faerie Courts as a representative of the White Council, nerves are strained like a hearing aid in an AC/DC concert.

Why was I even going to this thing? The war with the Red Court was quiet for now, so the senior members should have been able to go, but no, I had a 'personal relationship' with the Queen of Winter and the Lady of Summer, so I had to go.

Oh, for those of you that don't know, the Faerie Courts are some of the biggest big shots in the Nevernever, or spirit world for you laymen. They're split into three factions or 'courts' with one called Summer, another Winter, and the last are the Wild Fae. These guys are the kind of things you hear in old stories, fairies basically, but they're a lot more dangerous and a lot better looking than you'd think. They like to make deals with mortals then use the exact words of the deal to twist them around in various horrible ways. Not pleasant, so if you see someone that has looks to die for come up and offer you something way too good, 99% of the time that's a fairy looking to claim another victim.

The other 1% is called being a lucky bastard.

Anyway, the Red Court are vampires. No, they don't sparkle, and no, they're not socially awkward outcasts. These are rubbery bat-freaks that wear flesh 'cocoons', so to speak, in order to look human and blend in until they have a victim. Then they drain the poor sucker dry and start looking for more.

They're at war with the body of wizards I'm a part of, if not an entirely active member. The White Council is the largest collection of wizards in the world, with members hailing from all over, and they usually enforce the Laws of Magic, a set of Laws that protect the mortal world from the supernatural.

Breaking any of those Laws is grounds for immediate execution by the Wardens, the Council's enforcement branch. I don't have too high an opinion of just up and killing kids that broke the Laws unknowingly, being one of those myself, but I understood why warlocks, rogue wizards, needed to be put down.

Black magic like that is freaking addictive, and it leaves stains you can't erase. My own apprentice, Molly, knows that better than most.

Anyway, with that out of the way, back to my predicament. I was going to be walking into a meeting between the Fae Queens, the highest authorities of the Fae Courts, and I'd been tipped off that some absolute idiot from the Red Court was going to try and break the peace between the Courts.

Considering the Queens had control over the world's weather patterns, a war between the courts has the word 'apocalypse' written across it in neon pink paint with a few too many exclamation points.

Needless to say, that had to be stopped.

Problem was most of my allies were out of town or otherwise indisposed. As it were, I could probably just inform Mab, the Winter Queen, or Lily, the Summer Lady, and have it sorted out that way. The issue with that was the politics involved made any movements from either side that weren't strictly formal and known in advance would be taken as a sign of aggression.

The problem with immortals is they are so damned formal. Mind you, I'd used that old-school mindset against them more than once, but in this case, it was tying my hands,

Then, as I'm pondering this issue, I had a flier quite literally pop out of thin air and settle gently onto my gaping face. I've seen things appear and disappear from the air like this before, but there was no change in the energy around me. If I were, say, ten years younger that'd be no surprise, but teaching Molly the finer points of magic had made me more sensitive.

Though that was up for debate if you asked my few female friends.

I also had a variety of defenses in my apartment, read: cellar, so something like the flier shouldn't have gotten within a dozen yards of the door. Hell, Mouse, my moose disguised as a dog, didn't even notice until I grabbed the flier and shook it.

Getting past a goddamn Foo Dog was no laughing matter, let me tell you.

The thing is, this flier was just that, a flier. Regular paper, cheerful colors splashed across it, and a line of text that said the following.

 _Are the bad guys getting you down? Are you stuck in a situation that seems absolutely hopeless with no way to change it? Are you up against the big fish and need something to show them what for?_

Who used 'what for' anymore? No one talked like that if they weren't British.

 _Then call our service line below! Our team of consultants and operatives will come to you and come up with a game plan that's sure to solve your problem! In fact, we're so confident in our services, if you're not 100% satisfied, we'll owe you a big favor! That's no small thing, as that favor can be anything… so long as it isn't sexual in nature, we have standards._

I couldn't help but snort at that line. Whoever wrote this didn't have the best mind for advertising, but it was keeping me entertained.

 _One more time, we at the Bigger Fish Company will hear your every plea and request for free! All you need to do is call the line below and speak to a representative, we'll be glad to help! Every one of our staff has experience dealing with all kinds of situations, from school bullies to Fairy Queens and Outsiders._

That caught my attention. Unless this group was supremely idiotic, you don't make that kind of boast and not expect something bad to happen.

 _We look forward to your call Mr. Dresden, several of our members are quite eager to meet you. Once more, the number is below, and we've provided the necessary change for a pay-phone._

That was… spooky. I mean, why would they expect me to call them? Even adding my name to it wasn't too hard to believe considering the damn flier had popped into my living room while I was pondering my life choices.

 _Thank you and have a pleasant day. We just know Queen Mab will be thrilled to hear you couldn't at least find a date for tonight's event, even more so when you bring the bad news with no back-up._

Ok, that was just mean. Obviously, whoever this 'Bigger Fish Company' was, they wanted me to call them and quick. Normally, I'd send this kind of mail straight to the bin, but they'd made it pop up in my erstwhile sanctuary.

And that scared the shit out of me.

"Well, boy." I said as I got off the couch and went to grab my ever-faithful duster, staff, blasting rod, and other assorted instruments. "Looks like we'll be making a call. Mister, watch the house."

Mouse stood without prompting and followed me, his bulk barely fitting through the door, while my small mountain lion named Mister flicked his tail in dismissal.

I rolled my eyes, but barely took a step out the door before I smacked my forehead and rushed back in. After flipping up my Star Wars rug (vintage, I'll have you know) and unfolding the stairs, I picked my way between my model of Chicago and the other shelves groaning with various magical ingredients.

On one such cluttered shelf sat an ornate skull surrounded by paperback romance novels. I tapped the skull a couple times. "Hey, Bob, I need to ask you something."

The skull was inert for a moment before its eyes flickered to life, the skull yawning as Bob woke up. "Oh, what is it this time? I distinctly recall getting today off."

"Yeah, so Mab can't track you." I sighed, holding up the flier. "You ever heard of this group?"

Bob hummed as he scanned over the flier, looking none too impressed. "Nope, not once. What's with the business name, it sounds awful."

I shrugged and put the flier into my duster's pocket. "Don't know, but it quite literally popped into my living room. Never noticed anything until it was on my face, not even Mouse sensed it."

That made Bob's eyes brighten. "Oh, truly? Well… that's spooky."

"Says the talking skull." I groused as I went back to the stairs. "I'm going to see what this is about. While I'm at it, I need you to dig for some recipes for when I get back, still have vampires to deal with."

"And yes, I will get you another book in exchange, pervert."

I threw in that last bit, but Bob somehow shrugged and the skull dimmed. I muttered a few choice words before returning to the basement above that basement to find Mouse holding out his leash. "Ah, good dog. Don't want anyone thinking a moose is on the loose."

Mouse just kept wagging his tail.

"What, I thought it was clever."

Mouse continued to give me a dopey grin, but I knew he just didn't appreciate my refined sense of humor. "All right, ya critic, let's go."

I attached his leash to his lovingly cared for collar and we set out for the nearest pay-phone. Now, I was going to walk Mouse anyway and probably bring him with me to the big meeting tonight, because Foo Dogs are _big_ both magically and physically, but I brought him for another reason.

This guy knew bad mojo a mile before my puny senses could ever hope to notice, so he'd know if this was all some kind of trap. There'd been a lot of those after the war started and I got the Warden title.

Long story, trust me.

Anyway, it was a bit of a walk to the increasingly mythical pay-phone, but I'm just under seven foot and been running for a while to try and get in shape. Believe me, running is sometimes the best thing you can do when faced with some of the things I've faced down.

Also, wizards tend to short out anything made after WWII. The more complex the tech, the more delicate it was. I don't mean to boast, but I have quite a bit of magic, one of the heavier hitters among the Council in fact.

So, cell phones did not work for yours truly. Thus, I needed to use the ever-decreasing numbers of pay-phones to make any calls. I'd seen a bunch of kids taking _pictures_ next to one, like a novelty. Damn, I reminded myself how old I was.

Anyway, made the pay-phone, paid, and dialed the number on the flier. After the third ring I was considering hanging up and writing this off as an overly elaborate prank by Molly when the line clicked and a voice hit my ears. "Hello! This is the offices of the Bigger Fish Company, Lissa speaking! How can I help you?"

The girl on the line couldn't have been older than 18. "Uh yeah, I got one of your fliers. Popped into my apartment with my name on it, so care to explain?"

The girl gasped and became very excited. "Oh my gosh, Mr. Dresden! We weren't thinking you'd call at all! What's the problem, I'll send our help right away!"

I didn't do well with that kind of enthusiasm, usually meant someone was either trying to kill me or sell me something. "Look, how'd you even get this flier into my apartment? I've never even heard of you guys and something like that doesn't happen every day."

"You mean like that big meeting tonight at the big estate?" Lissa asked, which only confirmed my suspicions these guys _knew_ stuff. "Well of course not, we got everything set up an hour ago. We also know that you needed some help with your usual friends off doing other things, so we decided to offer. You up for it?"

I hummed and thought. These guys knew the supernatural, that was obvious, but what was in this for them? You don't make deals with this crowd without knowing exactly what they want and at least three ways to weasel out of it.

Well, that was the ideal, and I very rarely got to experience it.

"What do you want?" I sighed, cutting to the chase. "People don't just get my attention unless they want something."

Lissa tittered like one of those high-born ladies you read about in stories. "Well of course we want something, this isn't exactly a charity. Hm… how about an autograph?"

I call bullshit.

"I am not shitting on your bull, Mr. Dresden." Lissa said, as if reading my thoughts… which she may have. "Us at this office are actually big fans. Like, I can hear an argument in the back over who goes to help if you agree to this. All we want is an autograph and our services are yours."

I still didn't like this. They weren't specifying how they'd want that autograph, probably in blood, and how long it would be, full name most likely. This was way too good to be true.

"Harry Blackstone Dresden."

Perfect inflection, enunciation, and pronunciation. Hot damn I could feel shivers run up and down my spine like I'd been dunked in ice water. That… was not good.

"I know your Name, good sir." Lissa continued, voice still pleasant. "We know everyone's Name. The autograph we ask for is nothing but your first and last name, in regular ink, and that's it. Now, would you like to hire our services? It's a one-time deal."

I was a little too shocked to answer. Names had power in the supernatural world, to the point that if you knew something's full Name, you had immense power over them. This girl, who sounded so young, had used three-quarters of my Name so casually you'd think she was discussing the weather.

Now, I was really scared.

"What do your services entail?" I asked, hoping to stall for time. "Your flier wasn't all that clear."

"We provide consultation, assistance, and organization for all our client's needs." Lissa rattled off, apparently unconcerned with the quiver in my voice. "From simple advice to all-out war plans, we do just about everything. Specifics can be explained after we have a deal."

This was sounding a lot like Gard's company. "Even weddings?"

"You betcha."

This was too good to be true. "Bar mitzvas?"

"L'chaim!"

"Expos?"

"Got the stage set and ready to go."

"Star Wars conventions?"

"Do you want the Millennium Falcon or the Death Star?"

"Dare I say it… schools?"

"I have a list of all the best schools in the world and ways to get in and pay right here."

I blinked several times before one more came to me. "…Dating?"

"Matchmaker central."

Hot diggity damn, the sheer confidence almost made me believe! Then again, I'd been in worse spots with worse options… may as well take the plunge, it'd worked before.

"Alright, you win. I'll give you guys an autograph, just get your people here fast."

Lissa cheered on the other line and I heard something clicking like a type-writer. "Great, we'll have a team there in about a minute. Please stand away from any metal objects, cover your ears, and close your eyes. This'll be a bit flashy."

I didn't like that she hung up right after, but Mouse started getting beyond agitated and I did the smart thing. Ran to the nearest concrete valley and pressed hard against it, Mouse following me. About a minute later, a massive roar filled the air followed by a flash so bright it almost burned my eyes even though I was looking the other way.

After regaining my bearings, I peeked over the edge of the concrete and… stared long and hard.

There were four people standing on the sidewalk, looking around curiously. One was an average sized man in a fancy coat with gold designs and, I kid you not, purple hair. He was next to a woman of absolutely stunning beauty with an honest mane of scarlet hair falling over a simple white gown tied with a lavender ribbon.

Oh, they had matching wedding bands. Good for the guy.

Anyway, the other two were just as odd. One was a woman with grey hair in long curls who didn't look a day over twenty-five dressed in a sapphire pantsuit with fur over her shoulders. A CEO basically, if you want the cliché idea.

The last one was a guy with a bowl-cut and a face so freaking boring I almost didn't think it was possible. It was like I had to fight just to notice him compared to the other three. He had even more boring clothes, just dressed in a simple tan button up and black slacks.

"Mr. Dresden, would you care to join us?"

It was the man in the coat that spotted me, his eyes like opals. If they were trying to blend it, they were failing miserably.

I stood when Mouse gave no sign of threat, but I could tell he was weary. I was too, but if Mouse is nervous, I'm close to a panic. "You the uh, Bigger Fish people?"

The group grimaced, apparently agreeing it wasn't the best name.

"That we are," the red-head said. "Though please, don't refer to us as that. We're here to help, so if you must, call us consultants."

I claimed sole title of consultant of the weird though, so better to get names. "I think introductions are in order. Harry Dresden, Warden of the White Council, local PI, and so long as you don't mess with my town, we won't have any trouble."

They looked positively giddy at my attempted bravado, the coat-man going first. "My name's Robin Volk, the other guy's Kellam Ùir. The ladies are Sumia Falk and the red-head is my wife, Cordelia Volk."

Shakespeare, German, Gaelic and a variety of other North European names. This was already interesting. "Alright, nice to meet you guys."

"So, how good are you with meetings between major political powers and hurricanes?"

 _-Night-_

"What in the world are you guys?"

I asked that question as I adjusted the collar of the suit I'd been shoved into. After asking them how they were with the shindig we were pulling up to right this minute, in a damn limo no less, they descended on me with… enthusiasm.

I was taken to one of the high-end tailors where the proprietor looked none too pleased at my scraggly appearance. At least until the Sumia chick slapped some kind of card on the counter and the man started treating us like we were royalty. I don't know what the card was, didn't get a look at it, but I was soon getting fitted for the single most expensive set of clothes I'd ever known.

I don't think Marcone had such an expensive suit and the man ran Chicago's entire racket of organized crime.

Anyway, I was then taken to an upscale barber and got myself cleaned up before getting taken back home to shower and change. This all happened in a freaking Rolls-Royce that pulled up like two minutes after I started talking to these guys.

I was getting seriously worried at the amount of money they were throwing around. A new company just did not have this much to use, damn dealing with the supernatural.

As if to prove it, Robin was walking around in a suit that looked like something out of a fantasy military's high brass, medals decorating his chest while his coat had a cowl over it. Then Cordelia had added jewelry with stones I didn't know existed along with a new evening gown that did everything it could to draw the eye to her legs and hair.

Sumia though walked around in a gown you'd expect of a queen, ice blue and white mixed around like snowflakes on a field of black. Getting her hair styled made her look more like a queen of ice than just about anything I'd seen.

Kellam… kept his outfit. Slacker.

"We're no stranger to formal events like this, Mr. Dresden." Robin answered, adjusting his cufflinks. "Though it has been some time since we attended one with so many… self-important guests."

Ah, he knew what the fairies were like, good. You really shouldn't care about their smoldering good looks, what with their utterly alien way of thinking, but the unaware listened more to their hind-brain than their thinking brain and I was not so arrogant to believe I wasn't one of them.

"So long as no one tries to push us into something, we'll be fine." Sumia continued, a somehow reassuring grin on her face. "We do prefer words over violence, but we'll flex our muscles if it comes to that."

They did have muscles, but they were all built like decathletes rather than warriors. Considering how they'd nerded out at meeting Mouse and getting the big guy groomed with me, I wasn't too sure of their… muscles.

I didn't have much longer to think on it as the limo pulled to a stop in front of what could only be described as a palace, with more marble and granite than you could shake a stick at. I could even see gold and jewels lining the halls inside through the wide open grand doors admitting the guests. Along with a tasteful number of murals and statues, because of course.

Anyway, our chauffer opened the door and I exited with Robin, our hands going out in the picture of chivalry to help the ladies. Kellam came out a moment later and damn near vanished into anonymity, as if his boring aura was magnified. Yet, I felt nothing but the eyes of the other guests as we walked towards the door.

A host that could only be a fae greeted us. "Mr. Dresden… I see you found a date for the night."

I nodded politely. Manners are always best with creatures like this. "More or less. I have some guests that are joining me, but I'm afraid I could not find an entourage of ten on short notice."

"That is quite alright, Mr. Dresden." The host said, eyeing my suddenly stoic guests like fresh meat. "I believe our hosts will be… satisfied with this group."

I internally rolled my eyes. Faeries were concerned with two things, their games and sex. Why that was, I don't know, but the Fae were closest to humans and we tend to think about sex.

A lot.

Thankfully, the host gave us no further trouble as Mouse led the way inside. He'd been groomed into an almost literal lion, which tickled me to no end, so the crowd parted before us in a storm of whispers. I recognized a few of the guests, mostly Fae and other creatures I'd dealt with in the past, but as we entered the ballroom, I sucked in a breath.

Almost gliding towards us in a sinfully revealing dress was a fairy of nearly unsurpassed beauty and power, her red hair flowing behind her as if suspended in water. This one I knew all too well, considering she was my quite literal Fairy Godmother.

"Lea," I greeted as she came to a stop. "Shouldn't surprise me in the least you're here."

Lea, short for Leanansidhe, grinned a grin full of sharp teeth. "Why of course. Why wouldn't I heed my queen and attend this usual drivel. You know they're just going to rehash old problems, it'll be terribly boring."

I actually rolled my eyes this time. "Please, there's probably a thousand and six plots going on right this moment. So long as this goes smoothly, and Winter continues to allow the Council access to their Ways, I will stay clear of them."

"If only trouble was not such a boar." Lea seemed to agree, grin never dropping. "I'd heard good meat would be served tonight, but with such a gathering, who knows if it'll even arrive?"

I took the hint well enough. It looked like Lea was as annoyed as I was if she was skirting so close to just outright telling me the truth of the matter. "On that, we can agree. Now then, I believe my guests would prefer refreshments, and I need to get Mouse a spot on the dance floor. He needs to show his moves."

Mouse huffed at the very suggestion, but I gave him a sardonic grin and we wandered off. I was kind of surprised that these consultants were being so quiet, but then again, you never spoke with a Fae if you didn't need something.

"And there they are." Cordelia muttered just low enough for me to hear. "The Queens."

I followed her gaze and found them. Titania, the Queen of Summer, was someone I'd pissed off in the past, so I was not of great report with her. In fact, she'd sent the equivalent of the Nevernever's best assassin after me that I beat on a damned loophole that sent all the Fae into hysterics for months.

She was talking with a girl that had silver blonde hair and a forest green dress that, on close inspection, was made of leaves. In fact, the entire summer congregation had foliage themed dress.

Ah gotta love em.

On the opposite side, as it must be, stood the Winter congregation. They went with a far more glittery and furry route than their counterparts with jewels and furs that probably cost more than my entire street hanging off them. On most, it would look gaudy, but with their queen putting super-duper models to shame, it worked.

Oddly, even as I thought that, the ladies that had appeared out of a flash of light seemed to become even lovelier than the queens. Weird…

Unfortunately, I caught the Winter Queen's eye and she started towards me, her entourage following. So, a crash course here.

The Winter Queen was known as Mab, her more formal title being Queen of Air and Darkness. She could quite literally freeze this room solid in half-a-second if she wanted and could, at her height of power, plunge the world into an ice age. She also happened to be the one queen that somehow liked me despite my every attempt to aggravate her and I'd been an unwitting pawn in many of her plans.

As such, she was to this day trying to make me her Knight, which was basically a personal enforcer for the Fae royalty. I'd always refused.

The last guy to have that title… wasn't good, to put it lightly.

"Dresden," Mab greeted, my hand going out to take hers when offered. A quick kiss to her knuckles was all I needed to feel the chill, but my manners satisfied her and I pulled back.

"Your Majesty."

Mab looked to Mouse first, a respectful nod given and returned, before she looked to my guests. "My-my, so you were able to find a date. Friends at that too, pretty friends. You sure do know how to get them whenever you clean-up."

I didn't want to use up my snark reserve before the negotiations started, so I kept it cordial. "Were it that I got jobs that paid without hospital bills, I'd be able to do this more often. But, someone has to be the hero, or it's a sad story to start with."

Ok, maybe a tad sarcastic. That was ok.

Mab just gave me a patronizing smile. "Regardless, at least you came to fulfill your role. I suppose the kiddie version will have to do for you, but politics will be played out no matter the outcome. Mayhaps tonight shall simply be as boring as I expect."

Aha, she knew what was going to happen too. Whatever that idiot from the Red Court was doing, they weren't subtle about it.

Sumia shared a glance with her compatriots out of the corner of my eye and she cleared her throat. "Pardon me, Your Grace, may I speak?"

Oh, that was a big no-no. You didn't refer to a Fairy Queen as anything other than Your Majesty or You Highness. Your Grace was a greeting reserved for dukes and duchesses, and was thus considered an insult if used for someone of a higher station.

Mab knew it too, her gaze turning to ice as she looked to the stoic Sumia. "For that insolence, I should end you. Were it not for the wizard having you as a guest, you'd not speak again."

That was the good thing at least. Mab attacking Sumia without me offering it as recompense was a breach of the host-guest relationship, something held as sacred in the supernatural community. Mind, I had to offer it, or I'd be breaching it as well.

"Save your threats, Queen." Sumia said, incensing Mab and her entourage further without an ounce of concern. "My friend has already moved to remove the threat to this gathering, I simply wished to hear your opinion on where to deposit the scum."

The entire room was silent. No one except yours truly had ever disrespected Mab so much, and I got out of it since I was useful. Sumia was digging her own grave here and I couldn't stop it.

So much for being experts.

The ice that came for Sumia was expected, closing in from a thousand different directions with the intent of causing her as painful a death as possible. Everything exactly as I expected it.

Until the ice… froze.

Pardon the pun, but the ice quite literally stopped in its tracks after getting within a foot of Sumia. Not once did this woman blink as death came for her, as if expecting the ice to never touch her in the first place.

Then the ice… bowed. Like, it literally bent at a point equivalent to a waist on these icy spears and blades. All of it towards Sumia.

Mab… looked terrified, as did all those behind her and in the room at large. If she was terrified of something, normally I'd feel the need to turn tail and run, if not find a quiet place and gibber incoherently. But, that wasn't happening.

…Did I miss something? I feel like I missed something.

"Mab." Sumia said, and then I felt it. Power, unrestrained and beyond anything I'd ever felt before. Not even the worst monster I'd ever fought, a damned Walker of the Outside, was even close to this well of sheer power that suddenly stood next to me.

"M-my lady, I no idea was you!" Mab stuttered, _stuttered,_ before the entire room of Fae took a knee in supplication. My mind apparently recorded the scene as I would be able to recall it vividly years later, but at the time I was too busy picking my jaw off the floor.

Even Mouse was bowing for crying out loud!

"It matters not," Sumia said with all the authority she was apparently due. "Answer my question."

Mab kept her eyes on the ground, none of her usual haughtiness apparent. "The-the scum may be deposited here, Your Excellency, we shall deal with them posthaste."

Now that's a surprise. Your Excellency was a title reserved for Emperors and Empresses, something even higher than Queens. The only things I could think of were…

…Oh, Christ on a breadstick.

"I don't think the one you're thinking of would find that too humorous." Sumia jested as she looked to me, her smile back in place. "Though it looks like you've figured it out. Robin, Cordy, go ahead."

Robin bowed and… became lightning. Like, he became lightning in the purest sense of the word, skin and flesh turning to energy of unrivaled power that twisted and bent like an ancient serpent before settling into the shape of a grey wolf.

"I am Fenrir." The wolf said, its voice booming across the hall. "I am lightning. Upon my form and name was the Mad Wolf based, but I claim no kinship to that monster of Loki. All lightning is I and I am all lightning. You use its power with my permission alone."

Cordelia followed, her body engulfed in flames so hot I was boiling just being near them. The flames formed into a dozen wings that sprouted from a serpentine body, eventually forming a feathered snake that would make Quetzalcoatl jealous.

"I am Agni." The snake hissed, power adding to Fenrir's and damn near sending us all to the floor. "I am fire. All that cleanses and burns are of my domain, and all fire is I. The world uses fire at will because I allow it."

The ground shook and a huge hand of rock shot up, a gaggle of ugly bat-freaks crushed in its palm. Oddly, the floor parted for the hand and the body that followed like water, settling back when the colossus was revealed.

"I am Titan." Boomed Kellam's voice. "I am earth. No matter where it may be or what walks upon it, the earth is I and I the earth. It was after me that Gaia named her first children, and it was I in which those that came after imprisoned them. The earth gives life and holds all feet because I will it."

Finally, Sumia changed. Her body turned transparent and sharp cracks rent the air as she morphed into a lizard with its body half-fused to a pillar of something so cold the very air froze around it.

"I am Artezza." She said, the combined power of all four driving everyone to the floor. "I am ice. All that is cold springs from my flesh and all that is frozen is I and I it. Winter's power springs from me as surely as Summer springs forth from Agni, and we shall have the respect we are due."

"As will our client."

I was thinking more servant at this point. Who knew something like this would turn into such a howdy-do?

…Clearly I wasn't thinking straight, but can you blame me?

"O-of course, my lady." Mab said, trying to get up. Had to admire the willpower, because she got back onto her knee. "We… shall show you all due respect… and we will show your client respect… as well."

The gods, for that's the only thing they could be, glared down on the room before returning to their human forms and suppressing their power. The whole room, if not the whole city perhaps, breathed a sigh of relief as we picked ourselves up.

I noticed a few that didn't, short grunts and a few thralls by the looks of it. Goblins and the weak-willed thralls couldn't handle even the presence of such raw power.

"Now move along with your formalities and bring this business to an end." Sumia commanded, authority still ringing in her voice. "There are far more important matters for all of you to attend than this show boating. Also, we'll need to have a talk with this Red Court that's popped up about proper decorum. After that, and assuming our client is satisfied, we'll leave."

Mab nodded, Titania voicing her own support before the formalities began in earnest.

I was still so gob smacked I barely noticed Robin, or Fenrir as he was known, walk up to me and clap my shoulder. "Sorry about that, wanted to make an impression. Say, after this is done, want to get your friends together?"

He held up a card that, I kid you not, had an infinity sign on it. With his name.

"We'll get something good."

Hell's Bells what did I sign up for?

 _END_

 **Nothing good Harry, nothing good.**

 **Anyway, that's the first attempt at this idea. I didn't want to get too deep into a mystery here, that'd be a whole story, so I made it something that all parties could agree was pretty stupid. But, that's what you get with the young and reckless. Dumb stuff.**

 **I hope I did the characters credit and that the idea came across well. Again, if you have any requests or ideas for places to get a flier, let me know! I'll take on any that I have at least a basic understanding of, so I'll let you know if I do.**

 **Also, this will be in the regular section for the Dresden Files until we get the next chapter, then it will move to the general cross-over section.**

 **Hope you all enjoy this first offering!**


	2. It Was Tuesday

**It's about time we got the next chapter out! As I said, this'll be moving to the crossover section now, but we'll stick with Dresden for the first half.**

 **Someone has to explain what's going on here, especially when Harry has very different ideas about the names he's just heard.**

 **Then… we go somewhere fun!**

 **Let's go!**

 _It Was Tuesday_

The negotiations went as planned and my gaping ass was out of that palace faster than you could say 'happy hour.'

Mab and company had regained their decorum after being utterly humbled for likely the first time in millenia. It helped my 'consultants' hung to the back and rarely did anything beside chat and comment on the décor.

They attempted to engage me in the conversations, but one does not speak with gods that casually. I'd done it once, but that was when Odin was secure in his domain and I was a customer. This was another sort of thing, because if the old king of the Norse pantheon couldn't make Mab quail, then who was I talk to those that could?

Curiosity was doing a number on me as we left though, the limo ready to go. I'd only been able to give Lea a truly bewildered look before getting swept out with my little party of guests, one I saw her return.

That was not something you saw every day.

"Come now, Mr. Dresden." Robin nee Fenrir tried once more. "Seriously, just call us by the names we gave, we won't be offended. We're here to help, you just need to point out the problem."

I just looked at him, a brow raised in question.

"We weren't exactly honest with him." Sumia nee Artezza noted with a sigh. "Though it just never came up. How's this, we're going to get all your friends together and we'll explain what's going on in detail. Dinner's on us, and while we'd love to try McAnally's Pub, the proprietor refused such a large party on short notice."

Gotta hand it to Mac, unflappable even in the face of these things.

Cordelia nee Agni, I will stick to this name scheme until I'm all the way around, shrugged. "It matters little. Mr. Dresden, I and my husband will go out and resolve the problems your friends are taking care of right now while you and the others head for dinner. We already booked the place for tonight, and we put in a call to Father Forthill."

She tilted her head then nodded to her husband. "Alright, the big man upstairs just gave us the go ahead. We'll be back, just say hi to Charity and the kids, they'll get there same time as you. The others will be joining within twenty minutes."

They proceeded to vanish before my unbelieving eyes and I was alone with Sumia and Kellam nee Titan. Ok, done with that now.

"Where are we going?" I had to ask after several moments of silence. "Robin flashed me a card with a damn infinity sign on it, but there's no way some fancy sit-down place would let someone book on such short notice."

Kellam laughed. "We waved enough under their noses about… five months ago. You'll like it, promise."

I call bullshit, the Lissa girl said this got set up today.

Sumia settled into her seat and watched the lights go by. "While we're here, have any questions for us? The big explanation will happen once we're done with dinner, but I can do some small things."

I had about ten million to ask, but simple is always the best place to start. "What are you, exactly? I've seen Mab speak equally to gods before, but you had everyone in that room scared stiff. The names and explanations you belted out don't line up with what I know either."

Admittedly, I only knew that Agni was some Hindu god/goddess, but I've never heard of an Artezza. Titan was a classification too, not an individual, while anything named Fenrir had to deal with the mad wolf.

I did read a book or two in school, despite what my teachers thought.

Sumia cleared her throat and nodded to Kellam. "Well, that is true in this world, but… well we're not from this world. As you likely know, there are many realities beyond the one in which you now stand, including the one the Outsiders hail from."

I put two and two together, but for all I knew, it added up to six with them. "You're… Outsiders?"

"Not those damned abominations." Kellam muttered, apparently offended. "We're… cosmic, I guess you could say. Our scope of power and responsibility extends to _all_ realities, not just this one. When I say I am earth, I mean I am all the earth in existence. If there's so much as the concept of earth somewhere, I can go there."

My jaw fell through the car floor and started to drag along the street. Nasty road burn let me tell ya.

Sumia chuckled weakly. "It's true. When a new reality is birthed, we feel it become an extension of us. All the gods/angels/etc. that make up those new realities as its pillars know of us on an instinctual level, they just never think we'll actually show up."

"And for good reason." Kellam continued as I processed that. "All told, there's… several trillion realities at the moment. Most are very similar to this one, while others are wildly different, and there's a new one born every few minutes. Were it not for the help of the big guy upstairs, we'd have ceased to be presences at all with how spread out it is."

"God does exist." I realized, which sent the pair laughing. "Hey, I just had a revelation my friend would be weeping to hear about! At least now I know why Sunshine got so mad at me."

Sumia continued to chuckle but snapped her fingers. A moment later, who else but Uriel himself shimmered into being across from her with a sheepish look on his ever-handsome face. "Good evening, milady. And to you as well, Mr. Dresden, milord."

He nodded to each of us while I tried to process this next bit. "Wait… what?"

"He'll be joining us tonight as one of your associates." Sumia answered, Uriel shifting into the man I knew as 'Jake' though in much better duds. "It's been some time since any of us last spoke with him or any of the other angels."

At that point, I just kept my mouth shut. Seriously, this woman just casually summoned an Archangel, capital letter and all, like he was a naughty school boy. What next, trampling Satan?"

"That's Michael's job and you know it." Kellam said, making me glare at him. "What? You have loud thoughts my friend."

Uriel gave an understanding nod, so I just pouted and leaned back. "Traitor."

Everyone looked amused, but I refused to engage in anything else the rest of the ride.

…At least until we started to roll through Lincoln Heights. Then I knew where we were going.

"You rented out Charlie Trotter's?" I asked with no small amazement. "I could never _sniff_ this place, and you rented it out?!"

Sumia shrugged as we pulled up to the restaurant in question. "Money is no object for us, Mr. Dresden. Besides, we're making them lose a night of business, it's only right to compensate them."

I just blinked like a deer in headlights before getting out of the car. How the thing hadn't stopped working with my scrawny ass in it was a mystery for later, as I was too busy staring at the red carpet that had been rolled out.

"…How much did you pay them?"

Sumia scratched her cheek, sheepish. "Oh just… five million I think?"

I gave her the flattest look I could. "My landlady would like to speak with you."

Sumia laughed again and started walking to the door, only for another limo to roll up behind them, Uriel and Kellam opening the doors. As I watched, a gaggle of children in their Sunday best jumped out followed by Charity 'Mama Bear' Carpenter.

You may laugh at the title, but this woman damn near killed a Gruff in one shot. Those things are the mystical enforcers of the Summer Court, and she nearly killed one of the older and more powerful ones. Wrath thy name is woman described her perfectly when defending her family.

"Dresden." Charity greeted me, eyes scanning over my suit. "Whatever's going on, it appears someone finally cleaned you up. Maybe now I won't have to keep explaining to the police you're not a pedophile."

I glared at her, exasperated. "Seriously? One time and you never let it go."

I held up a hand to forestall her comeback. "I know, I looked like one, but I'd been shot at, bitten, clawed, and darn near roasted like Christmas duck. Let's just go inside, and hope this goes well, because your husband is supposed to join us before long if I heard correctly."

Charity didn't look like she believed me. I didn't either, last I checked Michael was down in California dealing with a Denarian sighting alongside Sasha.

I blink and who should be before me but the men in question, decked in full armor and with weapons bared, the Swords blazing with holy light.

A flash later and a silver coin plinked on the ground, the metal swiftly enveloped in frost.

"…What just happened?"

The question came from Sasha, a big black man with a heavy Russian accent and more cajones than your average marine battalion. He was decked in combat armor, and his sword was bared, but there was no threat to be found unless you thought a gaggle of children aged 16-4 was a threat.

Some people did, and I don't blame them.

"It appears the Lord has come to our aid." Michael answered, his dark hair matted to his head. "And dispatched our enemy at that. Why, it even appears we were taken back in time for dinner."

He sheathed his sword and smiled at his family. "Hello everyone, I didn't think I'd be home today, but it appears God had other plans."

"Agreed." Sasha rumbled as he put away his sword. "Good luck explaining this to the young ones, but I feel our arrival is too sudden. Not to mention someone has sealed the coin."

"Oh yay, it's Michael Carpenter!" Sumia squealed, almost skipping up to my old friend. "Hello sir, my name's Sumia, I'm a big fan of you and your family! I model my own marriage after yours!"

Oh right, fan-girl mode, great. At least Charity heard that last part, so she wasn't going to try and set up a pecking order.

Michael was gracious with her, as he was with everyone, before looking to me with a smile. "Harry, I see this has something to do with you. Care to explain why we're before one of the most overly extravagant restaurants in Chicago when I was in California not ten minutes ago?"

I sighed and walked up to him, my right hand going to his shoulder. "Not really, but I can tell you this. I found God today."

The joy that spread across his face made me so guilty when I dropped the other shoe. "As it turns out, He has lackeys even you don't know about, and they're fans."

Michael's face twisted in confusion before looking to Sumia and Kellam, who were playing with the younger kids. Then realization crossed his face and he crossed himself. "God's Blood."

An oath from him is worth its weight in diamonds from what I hear. "Yeah… even better, these are the kind that make Mab quail at the sight of them and Sunshine over there came on command. Why they're here, I don't know, but we're supposed to get an explanation."

I learned a while ago that keeping my friends out of the loop on things like this was a bad idea. It had led to a lot of bad situations, so I knew the value of honesty nowadays.

"I… should probably get dressed."

Michael's words were accompanied by another car arriving, Father Forthill stepping out in a suit with his clerical collar on and two suits on hangers. "Hello Mr. Dresden, I was picked up by your friends a little while ago. Not sure why I need to hold these suits, but…"

He trailed off as he spotted Michael and Sasha, understanding flashing across his face. "Ah, I see. At least there's no need for babysitting this time."

Michael and Sasha graciously took the suits, my Russian friend quiet after hearing what I had to say. The man was agnostic, despite the Archangel Michael himself giving the Sword of Hope to him in person, so I had to wonder what my quick summary was doing in that head of his.

As they went off to change, another flash of light deposited four people I knew very well. One was an elderly man in his usual overalls, Ebenezar McCoy. He was my old mentor and good friend. The other was a young woman with hair in a variety of colors and goth clothes, marking her as my apprentice Molly.

The next was a young man that was as classically Spanish as could be, one Carlos Ramirez. I'd mentored the guy after becoming a warden and he had talent in spades. Still a bit cocky, but the war had beaten most of that out of him through sheer necessity.

That last was the one and only Thomas Wraith, my half-brother. He got all the good looks of the family, to the point even Charity couldn't help but stare when he visited every so often. Came with being part incubus, but he was a stand-up guy that had figure out how to curb the Hunger that defined the vampire side of him and was always willing to help.

Unless his heart and soul Justine was in danger. At that point, he was as good as gone.

"Harry, what just happened?" Molly asked me after the group regained their bearings. "I was off tracking down that ghoul with Carlos and now we're here."

I shrugged and greeted McCoy. "Sir, I apologize for the unannounced visit. Care for some high-end steak to make up for it?"

McCoy stared at me before laughing. "Well Hoss, that sounds wonderful. Hope the mares won't be too mad at me for disappearing before handing out their feed."

I shook his hand before looking at Thomas. "I don't know, will they let you in like that?"

My brother shrugged, somehow looking fabulous in business casual. "If they'll let you in, of course they'll let me in. Now, what are we doing here?"

"I already asked that!" Molly shouted, though she was distracted by her family coming to greet her. Carlos was still trying to process all this, so I left him be, only for one more flash to deposit three people.

The first two were Robin and Cordelia, the former a little out of breath, while the last was the one and only Karrin Murphy. She looked like she'd just got off shift and hadn't had coffee in a while.

"Dresden," She sighed the moment she saw me. "What in the hell are you wearing?"

I looked down at myself and spread my arms like I wanted a hug. "Hey, I look good in this, don't deny it."

"You look like the pig you are." Murphy answered, destroying my masculinity once again. "A pig in a nice suit anyway. What's the deal this time, huh? Anger the Flash?"

I refused to bring Marvel into this. "Something that has to do with fans form what I can tell. My… new friends have promised to explain after dinner."

Murphy raised a brow looked behind me to see the restaurant, and sighed. "For the love of… Alright, but I'm nowhere near dressed for this. Neither are those four, for the matter."

McCoy shrugged and conjured a veil that made him look dapper as hell. "I'm quite alright Ms. Murphy. It's good to see you again after so long."

Murphy rolled her eyes before Robin vanished and reappeared with another four hangers. "Worry not about the wardrobe! Please everyone, take these and change, I have no doubt you're all hungry and burning with curiosity."

He glanced at his wife, who rolled her eyes. I see he was a god of culture who appreciated puns, maybe we could be acquaintances.

"Now that everyone's here." Sumia called over the gaggle of curious folks after everyone changed. "Let's head on in. Our reservation opens… now."

The doors opened on cue and the staff came out to greet us. Geez was it weird to be treated so well by people that would never give me the time of day otherwise, but besides our immense collective curiosity about why we were all gathered in the first place, dinner was great. Like, I'd never had food that good in all my life, even McCoy was impressed.

For about three hours, we all just… caught up. It'd been months since I'd seen a lot of them, and even longer since some had seen another, so it was a mostly jovial affair with my new friends swiftly ingratiating themselves to the others.

Then came the end, where Kellam tapped the ground after we left the restaurant and we were swallowed by the earth. Not the Carpenter kids, Uriel, or Charity, but I watched some kind of… image pop up on the wall that proceeded to speak in Charity's voice as she demanded to know where we'd gone.

"Forgive the sudden shift." Cordelia said as everyone looked at her, eyes narrowed. "We simply required a private spot. Now, if everyone could turn their attention to this wall, my husband will begin explaining."

She strode to the center of the room, a pillar of earth rising. Sumia, who'd taken hold of the frozen Denarian coin for the curious, conjured an honest to heaven crystal ball onto the stand which Cordelia began to manipulate, little flames dancing inside of it.

This somehow created a screen that took the form of something I didn't recognize, though Molly definitely did. "A PowerPoint? You're going to explain this with a PowerPoint?"

Robin shrugged as he took his place next to the screen, a cheesy set of letters spelling out 'Bigger Fish Company' on the wall. "Our marketing division has been having trouble coming up with a suitable presentation to explain things, so this is the best we have. Forgive the rough draft, but let's get down to business."

The screen changed to a very… cutesy image of a large group of people at a picnic.

"Damn it Nowi." Robin muttered before gesturing to the image. "While you get your chuckles out, allow me to explain. These are the members of our company, a little under forty all told. We specialize in problem solving, crisis management, and everything else under the sun. The four of us here currently are the inaugural team."

I did indeed laugh, for I was given permission. Trust me, that's not a regular thing.

The image changed to an equally cutesy slogan, which I won't repeat out of respect. Robin being so embarrassed was reward enough. "Our company is committed to bringing our clients the utmost satisfaction with their resolutions, and we'll do all in our power to achieve it."

The image changed again to show a simple circle with a big carp flapping in the center. "That's the symbol we have tentatively agreed on, so you'll know who's card it is should it pop up. As for who we are, specifically, well…"

The image changed again to show a long list of names, only some of which I recognized. "To put it simply, our members are the respective rulers of a portion of existence. And I mean all existence, including all other realities and dimensions therein."

Everyone who wasn't me gave him a stare that said just how much they believed that.

"There is one above us." Robin sighed, the image changing to a white cloud with sun beams shining from it, the cutesy figures playing underneath it. "We just call them boss. Guides all the various realities and sets them up whenever a new one pops into being. In other words, Michael, your faith is still intact."

I noted my friend breath a sigh of relief, even though he still looked suspicious.

"To finish up," Robin said, the image shifting to a circle with three divisions set in it. "We can't solve all the problems given to us, orders from upstairs. We can, however, take out one of the three on this slide. Give us a target, and we'll prove who we say we are. After that, we'll bid you all farewell, and the rest is up to you."

The screen switched to a big question mark. "Any questions before we head out?"

Molly raised her hand. "So… you're Outsiders?"

"Not this again." Cordelia sighed as she took her hands off the ball. "Look, we technically exist in and are part of _all_ realities. So long as there's a concept of what we are, we can go there. Heck, I could bring you a Walker's head to prove it. Even they believe in fire."

Her hair turned to flame, making the others jump back. When they looked at me for advice, I just shrugged. "Hey, Mab's scared of them, I got nothing."

Now they all just looked panicked. Couldn't blame them. If I didn't have a belly full of the best steak and lobster ever, or had a firm grasp on my senses, I'd be panicked about being in a small room with them too.

"Now that the explanation is done, what's the target?" Sumia asked, a board of ice springing up with three faces on them. "We can either remove the Outsider threat, the Denarians, or the myriad old dangers that lurk imprisoned right now but may be threats later."

I blinked and looked to my friends. "Uh… what do you guys think?"

McCoy shrugged. "Honestly Hoss, this is something I can't decide. Nothing in my life even comes close to this level of strange."

That was saying something. "Michael, Sasha?"

"It is our duty to deal with the Denarians." Michael answered, which was expected considering who I was talking to. "Let us deal with them on our own. We appreciate the intentions, but this is a matter for the Knights."

Sasha didn't say anything, only nodding in agreement.

The 'guests' as I shall now call them looked very impressed, Kellam walking over and smashing the face that looked like Nicodemus.

With that option gone, I looked to Ramirez. "What do you think? It looks like we have to solve the Red Court ourselves, but what else do we do?"

"Oh, we already took care of them." Cordelia said, we wizards and lone witch whipping around to stare at her. "They were getting a big ritual ready, something about being able to kill your whole line or something. They had all the stuff, so we grabbed the Red King and sliced him open over the altar after Robin charged the spell. All the full-blooded Red Courts should be dead now and all the half-bloods should be free."

…

…

…Wow.

"Really?" Ramirez asked, clearly hopeful. "That… that means the war's over…"

Cordelia smiled at him. "Be ready, for a power vacuum like that is going to draw all kinds of nasties."

Ramirez shook his head, too stunned to answer, so I looked to Molly. "Uh… any ideas?"

My apprentice looked between everyone in the room before shrugging. "I guess… the devil you know is better than the devil you don't? We know how to deal with the Outsiders and Denarians to some extent, but those other guys…"

I nodded in agreement. That was more or less my idea too. "All in favor of blowing up future headaches?"

I got raised hands all around, though Thomas looked a little upset, same with Murphy. "What, we don't get a say?"

I cocked a brow at them. "You raised your hands in favor, so I assumed we were all on board. What, do you actually want something else?"

Murphy shrugged and answered for him. "Not really, but you jumped the gun again. What if we wanted the ugly bastards from Outside gone, huh?"

"Then we'd do that, so I don't see the problem." I answered innocently, earning me a punch to the arm. "But that aside, I think we have our target. Would you guys mind taking care of all the other baddies, so we can focus on the big boys?"

The four in question grinned evil enough grins for the holy swords to start glowing, Kellam answering this time. "Gladly, though I'll need you, Mr. Dresden. Your friends can go with the others as witnesses, but I'll need access to Demonreach."

"I thought you were the earth." I shot back, Kellam shrugging as we began to rise out of the ground.

"I am, but it's polite to ask."

The next thing I knew, Demonreach was staring down at me with the closest thing to shock a genius loci/golem could muster. I hadn't even been back to the island for some time, so this was a surprise and a half.

"Warden…" Demonreach rumbled, looking to me then Kellam. "…The Lord of Earth…"

I gulped and gestured to Kellam. "He wants to blow up something here, think he can do it?"

Demonreach hummed in thought before nodding. "Yes… this being is far beyond those imprisoned below… even the immortals will fall before his fists…"

Kellam nodded graciously. "Then allow me to fulfill your purpose, guard. I have no doubt your prison shall hold many others after I am gone, but now you may… adapt."

I felt a shiver go down my spine at that, but that was mostly from Demonreach filling my head with all the information he'd been holding out on me. Who knew the genius loci was guarding a giant supernatural prison of nightmares, immortals, and _dark gods!_

While I tried to wrap my head around **that** tidbit, Demonreach led us underground. It was there I spotted the inmates of this prison, all of them frozen in crystal.

By heaven, there had to be at least half a dozen of those naagloshii bastards in here!

"Minimum security." Kellam noted as he looked around. "I can feel the real bad-boys down further in the rock. Tell me, is the leyline designed to explode if security fails?"

I blinked at the very idea, knowing that much power going loose would level most of Illinois.

Much to my horror, Demonreach nodded.

Kellam though, was all smiles. "Good, then this'll be pretty simple. Hold onto your ass, Dresden, we're about to get serious."

I was tempted to do just that, but what happened next… is hard to describe. It was like watching a river flow and twist, but it was the earth doing it. I watched the creatures in the prisons begin to writhe against their bonds as green energy began to pour from the earth like a flood, the prisons swallowed whole.

Then came shaking, and roaring, and crashing, and thumping, and all manner of movement that one experiences in an earthquake. The very ceiling shifted into stone fists that crashed into monstrosities rising from below, the green energy making even the most grotesque and horrid of them screech in pain.

I blocked out the worst of them from my memory, but it was something else watching Kellam turn into a giant of earth that looked like a microcosm of the world, only to do battle with some tentacle limbed fiend straight out of Lovecraft's twisted mind.

I don't remember what happened after that, as the earth turned into a sink hole and all in it was crushed like an entire planet was dropped onto this small place under Demonreach, such was the density of earth Kellam had enchanted and called forth to slay these things.

And the best part was, after waiting almost an hour, nothing moved.

"…They are dead."

Demonreach saying it just about made me faint. Kellam had done it, he'd slain those that shouldn't have been able to be slain!

"That was a doozy." Kellam quipped as he reformed and dusted his hands. I really wanted to wring his neck for being so casual, but I'd done the same before.

Kellam turned and bowed to me. "With that done, our service is at an end. I wish you luck in your future endeavors, Harry Dresden, and know that every challenge can be overcome no matter the mountain one must climb."

I blinked and found myself back home, Mouse jumping off the couch to greet me. "Uh… what?"

"I could ask you the same." Molly muttered as she entered the living room from my room. "I just watched that Cordelia chick turn every warlock from here to Japan to ash."

"Are we going east or west in that estimation, Padawan?"

I was obviously shell-shocked, so the snark came unbidden. Molly rolled her eyes at me. "Going west, I'm pretty sure we circled the globe. The glee that woman had, it was something else."

I nodded and flopped on my couch. "What a day."

"Agreed." Thomas said as he opened my front door. "I saw Fomor and other nasties get electrocuted like nothing else. What a day to see a lightning god go to work."

I snorted and shrugged. " _The_ lightning god, my good man. Wonder what that Sumia chick did, I saw Kellam lay waste to immortals and dark gods alike."

Who else but Michael chose then to come through the door. "I watched her freeze Hell."

I could hear the capital letter. "Wait… so she went and took care of the demons?"

Michael nodded, eyes far away. "I saw more ice than I ever thought possible, demons skewered and sundered by the tens of thousands, all in moments. It was… awe-inspiring."

I looked amongst my friends and sighed. "I'll puzzle out how Mouse got here and where the others are later."

I stood, went to my cabinet, and pulled out four battles of Mac's brew. "Michael, I respect you, and care for you as one of my own, but we all need a drink."

Michael stared at me before shaking his head. "Molly's old enough as is, it's not like we're in public. To crazy days I guess."

I passed out the beers and we cheered to that before chugging. For most people, something like this would've been a tale worth telling all their lives.

For me, it was Tuesday.

I hate Tuesdays.

 _-Robin and Co.-_

They finished their work, bid Dresden and his friends goodbye, and returned to base.

When the light faded, and they looked around, the offices were still in the depths of construction with most everyone else running around trying to get things ready.

Why did the boss have to forbid them from using their immense powers to do this?

Sighing, the four split off to report. Kellam would go to the boss, Sumia would let Lissa and her husband know how things went, while Robin and Cordelia would inform everyone else after finding their daughters.

It would be a fun conversation for sure.

Then an intercom crackled to life. "Testing-testing, 1-2-3… can everyone hear me?"

Everyone paused in their trek to look towards the second floor, Lissa waving some fliers over her head. "We got the next two locations for the trial period set! Anyone interested in… the Overlord universe and the Code Geass universes, please meet with me and Miriel in the next hour!"

A number of cheers rose from the crowd before everyone got back to work. There was bound to be more arguments about who got to go where, but this was bound to be fun.

It'd be hilarious to show those guys in Nazarick just how far down the totem their 'Supreme Being' was, but they'd at least give Momonga something to show for it. It was kind of mean sticking him with so many lovely ladies and not have the ability to work it out in a more… productive manner.

Thank the boss for the baculum! **(1)**

Oh, and seeing those pretty boys have a nervous breakdown as mechs went flying would be _amazing_.

Good times were ahead… if they could fix their freaking marketing division!

Whose bright idea was it to let Nowi and Henry head that up again?

 _Ch. End_

 **A baculum is, to put it bluntly, a penis bone. Most placental mammals actually have the darn thing, humans are one of the exceptions. Go figure.**

 **Alright, that's a chapter everybody! Next two will cover the universes mentioned above, but please feel free to request others! Most will be one-shots unless I feel two parts is necessary. Hope you all enjoy now the we're where we belong!**

 **Bye!**


	3. Razing the Tomb

**Alright, after much debate and finishing class for this calendar year, I've decided Overlord will be our next stop.**

 **I wasn't happy with losing that one decent group of Workers, mostly because I feel dear Momonga made a** ** _very_** **poor choice killing them when there was so much information to be found.**

 **So, we'll have our set of idiot gods send their flyer to said group the day before they head off.**

 **Let's have fun!**

 _Razing the Tomb_

"What the hell?"

Hekkeran Termite stared at the flier that had landed on his face, the sheet of parchment having appeared out of thin air. Considering Roberdyck hadn't sensed anything, along with Arche at that, this thing had been sent by some real high-level sorcery.

"Where did that come from?" Imina asked, mug half-way to her lips. "Did someone drop it?"

Arche looked to the second-floor landing of the inn, but there wasn't a soul in sight. "…No, that was magic. I… don't know what kind though."

"Well, does it say something?" Roberdyck asked, eyes narrowed in concern. "It's a bad omen as is considering we just took that job."

Hekkeran grimaced in agreement. They'd been summoned to the abode of Count Flemel himself and given the task to explore a newly discovered large tomb alongside three other Worker parties. Personally, he felt something rotten about this job, but they were promised that whatever they found in there could be kept as a reward.

New dungeons were bound to be full of treasure at just the entrance, so he was hoping they'd be able to duck in, grab what they could, and get out. New treasure was bound to pay off Arche's debt and the lot of them would probably be able to retire and live peacefully.

Well, that was the hope anyway, and the flier in his hand made that hope seem far indeed.

"Alright, let's give this a read." He sighed. "But before that, Arche, this thing's not going to blow up in my face is it?"

They'd had that happen before and he was not looking forward to a repeat.

Arche shook her head after concentrating on the parchment for a moment. "…No, there's no enchantment on that parchment I can sense. It appears all the world like a normal flier."

That was good enough for Hekkeran, who started to read. "Alright, so… _Are you down on your luck and about to charge into the unknown seeking fortune? Have you reached a stage in your life that requires throwing yourself into danger? Have debts and mistakes not your own come calling? Then our team of consultants and workers at the Bigger Fish Company are just for you!"_

Imina looked at the parchment with a scowl. "What the heck is that cheesy intro? It sounds like some brand-new shop-keep putting out their first ad."

Hekkeran shrugged and continued reading " _Our range of expertise goes from exploration to cleansing undead. We're especially good at helping first time tomb explorers not only find their way through the undead hordes that await, but get out alive with the treasure! We also help divvy up the bounty in a fair manner and we have extensive knowledge of any and all economic laws, so we can clear any debt at that!"_

Arche perked up at that, which told Hekkeran and the others this was getting interesting. "Do you really think this would be able to help?"

Hekkeran smiled at her, but held up his hand for patience while he finished the last line _"If you're interested in our services, please bring this flier to the town-square after the bell tolls seven. Please bring three copper coins in case you decide to hire us. Thank you for your time we look forward to see ing you…_ Farsight?!"

Imina reached over and ripped the parchment out of Hekkeran's hands, eyes landing on the last line. "No way they addressed this to us, they can't know what our job is!"

As if in rebuke, a new set of sentences appeared below the last line, Roberdyck reading them out loud over Imina's shoulder. " _If you wish to know more about how we know so much, again, please come to the town-square, only your team. We mean no harm, but wish to discuss the possible use of our services. Your lives depend on it."_

The team looked to each other before picking up their mugs, chugging the contents, and hurrying out of the inn. Seeing magic like that and being told whoever used it had a personal interest was enough to light a fire under their feet.

After all, who's to say the mysterious group that had such a disarmingly cheesy title would take getting stood up well?

As such, they arrived in the town-square right as the bell tolled seven times, not a soul in sight. The eerie sight only made the team's nerves skyrocket, but much to their shock, they watched a figure quite literally rise out of the square's well.

"Oh, you're early." The figure said, voice tinged with surprise. "I didn't think anyone would actually believe the flier, considering how damn cheesy marketing made it. So, you guys Foresight?"

Hekkeran and Imina stepped forward, slightly shielding Arche from the figure. "Yeah, that's us. I assume you're with that Fish company?"

The figure scratched their head, embarrassment clear in their masculine voice. "Yeah, still working on the name, but that's me. I was sent ahead to see if you guys would even want help at all, but I know the job's supposed to be confidential."

"Your flier mentioned this meeting had to do with our very lives." Roberdyck rumbled. "So yes, you can imagine that we'd want to know what was going on considering only our employer should know about the job."

The figure shrugged and pulled down their hood, revealing a young man with orange hair and a black bandana wrapped around his head. "Well, to start, the name's Gaius. I'm here to tell you that the tomb you've been tasked with exploring is home to things that only the Dragon Lords could hope to go against. Not only that, the master of said tomb knows your coming and wants to use you as a test for the defenses."

Jaws dropped, not one of them believing Gaius's words.

"I can tell you're shocked and in disbelief." Gaius drawled. "Trust me though, my group and I know a lot. For example, pointy ears and the dual-wielder there finally started dating after far too long. Little Miss Mage is here because she wants to rescue her younger sisters from their spendthrift parents. In fact, you taking this job is all for her benefit."

The team tensed as Gaius displayed his knowledge of their private details. Ashe had told none save the team her circumstances and none of them had breathed a word of it to anyone else. Whoever this Gaius guy really was, his information network must have been vast.

"Look, I mean no harm, I just want to help out." Gaius said with hands raised in surrender. "You guys are one of the few decent Worker groups in the world, and I'd hate to see good people killed because some jackass didn't share all the information. So, you want to hire me and mine? We only require three copper and we're all yours."

Imina could see Hekkeran considering it, so she decided to stall for time. "What exactly can you lot do? The flier said undead cleansing and exploration along with mediation and survival skills. Sure, that helps, but what else can we expect?"

"We have a combined area of expertise covering most everything you can think of." Gaius answered. "Healers that can mend even the most heinous wounds and insidious poisons. Clerics that can dispel any curse. Mages that can flatten mountain ranges and warriors that can defeat countries by their lonesome. We also dabble in more mundane fields such as organization, agriculture, smithery, potion brewing, and so on."

He held up three fingers with a smirk. "All that for three copper. I'd say it's a worthwhile deal, no?"

Hekkeran looked to his comrades and lover before shrugging. "You obviously know a lot more about us than we thought, and you've got no reason to lie far as I can tell. Sure, if it gets us out alive and Arche out of debt, we'll hire your group."

Gaius looked very pleased. "Alright then, that'll be three copper. Where are you meeting tomorrow? I was told the various hired parties would be setting out then."

Hekkeran pulled out the coin and handed them to Gaius, the meeting place barely passing his lips before the strange man melted into the shadows. A moment later, the square came alive again like nothing happened.

"That's… spooky." Robertdyck muttered. "I don't know about you Hekkeran, but I need a lot of beer right now."

Hekkeran gave a long sigh before answering. "Agreed. Arche, go with him and make sure he doesn't get too plastered. Weird shit aside, we still have a job to do."

Arche nodded mutely, unable to process her thoughts and feelings after that short meeting.

Imina had other plans, holding Hekkeran back while Robertdyck and Arche went back to the inn. Once they were gone, she spun him around, looked him in the eye, and said: "You, me, bedroom, now. I'll bang the stupidity of agreeing to this contract right out of you."

Hekkeran was not one to disagree to such a demand.

 _-Morning, Meeting Place-_

Unsurprisingly, Arche was the only one to arrive at the meeting place walking straight. Due to the nature of her companions' less than active states, they were the last to arrive with only the Count's servant there to greet them. "What was the delay, Foresight? The other groups have long left."

"Several things," Hekkeran answered, gait oddly stiff. "But we're here and ready to go. You have the directions?"

The servant nodded and gave Hekkeran a rolled-up map. "This will lead you to the outskirts of the tomb. The wagon is already prepared with the necessary supplies. The Count expects your report in three days."

Hekkeran nodded and gestured for everyone to get in the wagon. Once everyone was in, the driver whipped the reins and they were off.

"They didn't show." Imina muttered a short while later. "At least it was only three copper for a bunch of lies."

"Darling, I'm hurt you'd say that."

The entire group flew into a brief panic as Gaius appeared in the wagon with three others, the new weight jostling the wagon. When Hekkeran looked to see what the driver was doing, he found a strange suit of armor at the reins.

"Don't worry about him." Gaius said as he settled onto the wagon's floor. "We just transported him back to the clearing you set out from. Forgive the lateness, but one of ours slept in."

He glared at one of the new passengers, a young man in heavy armor with a pot of all things on his head. "Hey, I said I was sorry. Can't help workin' in new soil, ya' know that."

Gaius rolled his eyes and started introducing his fellows. "This is the team assigned to you for the duration of this exploration. There's myself obviously, while Mr. Tin Head is Donnel, our front-line combat expert."

Donnel gave a polite nod in greeting.

"The one on my right is named Panne." Gaius said, gesturing to a woman with dark skin and tribal markings, her dark hair tied into braids while red eyes stared at the Workers. "Her job is scouting and harassment, she'll be our eyes on this sojourn. She can hold her own too, so don't feel bad if you have to retreat."

The last newcomer introduced themselves. "My name is Maribelle, and my husband is sadly making a pig of himself by sitting on the floor. I'm the magic support, I'll be removing any mystical obstacles and altogether laying waste to the rapscallions that dare challenge us."

Gaius only chuckled, seeing Foresight rendered mute by the introductions. "And I fill in the thief archetype who opens the doors and kills anything from the shadows. As stated in our contract, we're here to help and get you lot out alive. Also, since you already paid our fee, anything that we end up getting from the tomb goes to you guys."

He leaned back and smiled. "So…"

"What're your plans for the future?"

 _-Nazarick, Throne Room-_

"Something's wrong."

The words of the Supreme Being Ains Ooal Gown were met with hurried promises that nothing was wrong and the situation was under control. In truth, it was, as the ones that were being used as a test for the security system were being systematically torn apart.

Except for one group of eight, who Ains was watching with keen interest.

He was waiting on the 6th floor arena for the party he was watching to inevitably fall into the teleportation trap at the end of the hall they were running down, so that he could test himself against a group considered equivalent to mithril rank adventurers. There'd be a lot to learn in their bodies, and if they gave him a good fight he'd at least make their deaths quick and painless.

 _Really, they don't appear to be bad people. If they weren't here to steal our treasure, I'd just have them kicked out._

Momonga sighed in exasperation. While he wanted to test the security system, the ones he'd been sent weren't worth much despite supposedly being amongst the best. Only that group of eight was getting anywhere and they'd have to face him before long, so it looked like the systems would have to find a better challenge.

 _Maybe a mock invasion using Demiurge as a commander? He'd certainly jump at the opportunity if it meant improving Nazarick._

His musings came to an end as the magic circle of the arena flared, the group of eight appearing in sandy theater. Deciding now was the time to make his entrance, Momonga signaled Mare to start only for a voice to interrupt anything.

"Momonga!" Gaius called to the empty theater. "Come out you big skeleton! I know you wanted a challenge for this place, so bring it! I never took you for a coward in the first place, so I know you're here and ready to grandstand!"

Momonga blinked several times, not really processing what the orange hair man said. Those watching though, understood quite well.

"Slay that blasphemous filth Mare!"

Momonga was still processing what to do next when Albedo bellowed the order, the dark elf in question leaping from her spot in the stands, ready to rend Gaius in half.

To the surprise of all watching, Mare not only missed, but slumped to the ground, her head rolling away from her body.

With no one noticing, Mare had been killed. One of the floor guardians, gone, just like that.

Momonga snapped and roared forward, only for something to seize him and stop his every move. Whatever it was, even the strengthening effects of his armor weren't enough to break the bonds.

"Alright, time to set to work." Maribelle called, a wave of her hand sending half the party away. "Sir Momonga and those who serve you, we have come to see to it that not only do the innocent keep their lives in this farce you call a test, but to show you something. Call forth every guardian and monster you have forth and we will give them something they are sorely missing."

"A beating."

Momonga finally broke the binding and thundered forward, eyes glowing with unholy fire. "Who are you demand such a thing?! You have slain one of my own and slandered my name in my own home, death will be a kindness after I'm through with you!"

Panne sighed and threw aside her cloak, fur showing her as a demi-human. "As if you could kill the fount of life itself, Wight."

Momonga felt a sense of dread settle over him, but it was minute and ignorable. "Ha, strong words for one that wears the shape of a rabbit. I will use your skin for a fine pelt, that will settle part of your transgressions."

At that moment, Aura fell dead, his head rolling away while Gaius stood over the corpse. "I don't think she's talking too big, bone man. We aren't members of this New World you've found yourself in, and we sure as hell ain't weak for that matter."

Maribelle started to stride forth, a storm forming in the sky above when it had no right to. Even Albedo, who was mute from rage, gaped at the sight for none should be able to manipulate Nazarick's atmosphere aside from Momonga. "I'll be taking your little harlots on myself. For all their power, I'm sure even they can't stand up to multiple hurricanes drilling into their bones."

Donnel… started to crackle with energy. "I'll take care of the small fry. Shouldn't take more than a gamma ray burst to do them in."

Momonga started to get really nervous, mind recalling specific enemies from YGGDRASIL that scared every player and NPC shitless.

"Oh, he's catching on!" Gaius sang, enjoying Momonga's jaw drop and eyes shrink to pinpricks. "You guessed it my man, the ones who stand before you are some of the most feared and powerful things you know."

He gestured to Panne, who began to grow into a monstrous rabbit with plants, fungi, and all other forms of life practically flooding from her fur. "Viridios, the Fount of Life from which all things, even the Undead, come.

He pointed to Donnel, who was swiftly turning into an undulating tower of energy. "Aurora, Birther of Stars and source of all plasma."

Next came his wife, who was turning into a miniature twister with burning arcs of lighting in the place of eyes, clouds swirling around her with enough speed to create a high-pitched whistle. "Tlaloc, my dear wife and Stormbringer. I believe you knew her quite well."

He smirked and looked down at the arena, most of the guardians having arrived alongside their forces, panic setting in amongst them as Gaius began to change, fangs extending out of his jaw while a serpentine tail swished behind him. "Me though, everyone knows me in that game."

"Apophis, the World Eater and Ruler of Shadow, at your service."

Momonga blinked several times before looking around and sighing.

This… was gonna be a lot of gold.

And then Demiurge got eaten by something Panne spawned.

Oh boy.

 _-Meanwhile, Foresight-_

When the second flash of light faded away, the members of foresight found themselves on the outskirts of the tomb once more, but surrounded by enough treasure to make the emperor himself envious. There was also a note stuck to Hekkeran's face.

Robertdyck took the note, being the first to shake out of his stupor, and read it aloud. "Thank you all for being with us, we arrived where we needed to thanks to you. If you should hear any loud bangs or howls, please vacate the area, but be sure to take your reward. We've provided you with a bag that has been enchanted to hold all the treasure we left with you and it's enough to pay off Arche's debt. What's left over will be enough for all of you to retire and live peaceful lives, and don't worry about those you saw in the tomb, we'll make sure they leave you alone."

He looked to Arche and smiled. "Hey, that's good news right? Once we get all this packed, everything can finally go your way."

Arche collapsed to her knees and wept, gratitude and relief flooding her mind. In those last moments, she'd seen the true power of those who'd come with them and the sheer pressure had nearly driven her mad. Yet, they were benevolent gods and desired to help, as the gold around her showed.

"Well… I think retirements a good idea." Hekkeran muttered after coming to his senses. "I don't think I'll be able to do much more fighting after seeing that."

Imina agreed. "Yeah… looks like we can start up that shop you were talking about now though, right?"

Hekkeran shook his head and picked up a coin, the gold metal gleaming in the setting sun. "Yeah…"

"And all for three copper at that."

 _-Nazarick, Three Hours Later-_

Mamonga sat with his face in his hands, not wanting to look at the scene before him.

Everything in Nazarick, every NPC he'd built or seen built, everything he'd ruled over and the only reminders of his friends…

Slaughtered.

It was to be expected really. Four World Enemies, the highest and most feared of all YGGDRASIL monsters, had decided to turn everyone into a corpse. It didn't matter who tried to go against them, even Rubedo and those from the 8th floor, all died.

His magic useless, his skills doing little more than make the gods laugh.

Cocytus turned to ash before his eyes, swallowed by Aurora's beams of pure energy.

Shaltear torn apart from the inside, Viridios's spawn growing out of her skin like cordyceps.

Demiurge swallowed by Apophis alongside Orphan.

Tlaloc scouring the Pleiades flesh from their bones with winds and the sand of the arena.

Sebas rent in two by a line of light.

Pandora's Actor crushed in Apophis's coils.

Even Rubedo, the strongest of them all, was swallowed by a stream of shadows from Apophis, leaving nothing but a withered, dead husk.

The failure was… inconceivable.

"Well, we're done with that part." Apophis hissed, looming over Momonga with his fellows. "Tell me, Momonga, now that all your work is destroyed, what will you do? We are well aware that the damage and death can be fixed, but your… invincibility is shattered."

Momonga didn't look up. "I… do not know. I never imagined those like you would be here…"

"Of course not, this world is far weaker than the game you left behind." Panne answered, the swish of leaves marking her movement. "Besides us, few if any here can withstand your might. It has already seen its fair share of players like you though, and the world hasn't recovered from the last batch. Why else would you find so little of worth here?"

Momonga looked up this time, the World Enemies reverted to humanoid forms. "Then… this world require leadership?"

"Yes, but not with the way your NPCs are set up." Maribelle sighed. "We're all well aware of your circumstances in the game, but there's literally no reason to be evil here. It's even quite easy to align a conscious and your NPCs less than noble ways of seeing things."

Momnga raised a metaphorical brow at them. "…Why do you advise me? Are you not here to end me?"

"Now ya ask that question." Donnel groaned. "And nah, that ain't it. We're on the job is all, and we have to figure out ways to get this world back in balance. Fer example, you spyin on that emperor is makin' him lose his thrice-damned mind and that ain't good."

Momonga tilted his head in question, prompting Gaius to continue. "Believe it or not, this world needs a _lot_ of good to get back in order. You can be that good, and without being seen as weak or what have you. Those under you, should they question your actions in any way, can be persuaded that you are just doing the subjugation subtly and more completely. After all, trying to work through fear almost always leads to hate, but get the people to love you… well, I think you get the point."

Momonga had life back in his eyes, the irony of which was not lost on Panne or Gaius. "I see… then this was a test."

"More or less." Panne answered. "You can allow yourself a conscious, Momonga. You are who you are, not the Lich King, and that should show through. After all, should you become a true Lich King, you as you are will die and be replaced by something that Touch Me would decry."

Momonga looked away, knowing she was right. "…Very well, I can only promise my best though."

"Your best can be a lot." Gaius said with a laugh. "Now, we aren't going to leave you with a lesson and some advice, far from it. Panne, if you wouldn't mind?"

Panne looked at him with a glare before waving her hand, a stream of green sparkles flowing forth and ssuffusing Momonga. A moment later, he felt something new and looked down.

His jaw clicked as it fell open. "…Uh…"

"Never took a biology class did you?" Panne said with an exasperated sigh. "It's called a baculum, and it should get quite a bit of use from here out. Now then, part two."

She looked to Gaius who grimaced before he turned around, retching noises filling the air. Momonga was far too focused on his new addition to pay any attention, but he finally looked up to see the half-digested remains of Demiurge and Orphan joining the carnage of the arena.

"…Ew."

Gaius coughed and wiped his mouth. "It's even… worse for me bone-boy. Panne, get on with it so we can head home, I need some mouthwash."

Panne rolled her eyes and life returned to Nazarick, those slain rising once more with their wounds healed like the great slaughter had never occurred.

Before anything could be said, Maribelle appeared before Momonga with storms in her eyes. "Leave those who were with us be, by the way. They were simply means to get in and their reward came from our own treasure, not Nazarick. Touch them though and not only will we return, we will end you all permanently. Am I clear?"

Momonga nodded and they were gone, all silent for a time before Momonga sighed.

"…I need a drink."

Then hell broke loose, even more so when Albedo and Shaltear spotted his newest addition.

To say they were excited was an understatement.

To say Momonga had a long few days ahead of him was also an understatement.

…

Did Panne forget to mention he could conceive now?

 _-Home Base-_

The team returned to the office with a collection of sighs. While they hadn't had time for much in the way of shenanigans, being the people of that world weren't much for it, at least they got to stretch their muscles a bit.

"Oh, guys, that was quick." Lissa said as she walked up. "We thought this'd be longer like with the first team."

Gaius shrugged as his partners in crime slowly wandered off, Maribelle going to see if their son was ok. "What can I say, that place wasn't good for gags. All of them were way too serious and we couldn't get them to relax either. Ended up going straight to the fight too, so that was fun at least."

Lissa frowned and pulled out a sheet of paper. "Alright, but you need to fill this out. We'll be keeping an eye out on that world for awhile yet, so full accounts would be best."

Gaius nodded and took the paper. "I'm just glad most of the office is set up. Did the second team leave for the Geass universe yet?"

"That they have!" Lissa giggled, waving for Gaius to follow her. "We got TVs set up in the break room for the event. Get that report finished and you can watch with everyone else, it's bound to be a riot."

Gaius chuckled and went to his desk, wanting to get this done.

Seeing pretty boys trying to stop the very concept of metal would be… interesting.

 _Ch. End_

 **Yeah, this one just didn't have the jokes a flowin. I wanted to do something funnier with it, but the way it ended up happening just didn't do it for me. Mostly because Overlord itself derives its humor from Momonga and his reactions, so considering most of those he cared for were getting shredded… yeah.**

 **I swear the next universe will be a lot more humorous, especially since I have a LOT of material to poke fun at in Code Geass.**

 **That's all folks, see you next time!**


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